Category: humor
DPRK will Land On the Sun In 2028 (Joke)
| September 24, 2017 | 8:23 pm | Donald Trump, DPRK, humor | No comments

The DPRK announced that they plan to land on the sun in 2028. This means that North Korea plans to land on the sun in 10 years.

Kim Jong-un was asked about this projected accomplishment. The interviewer asked him how they were going to accomplish this since the sun is so hot.

After thinking for a moment, Kim Jong-un replied that they would land at night.

His supporters responded with thunderous applause.

Donald Trump was asked about the projected accomplishment of Kim Jong un. He replied “That idiot! Everyone knows that there is no sun at night!”

His supporters responded with thunderous applause.

 

Image result for kim jong un

Someone finally put Trump in his proper place!
| March 15, 2017 | 9:23 pm | Donald Trump, humor | No comments
Trump in his proper place

Trump in his proper place

Oval Office Cold Open-SNL
| February 5, 2017 | 9:54 pm | Donald Trump, humor | No comments

What is a Canadian?
| January 14, 2017 | 6:30 pm | Canada, Health Care, humor, Texas "Open Carry" | No comments

Canadian

Happiness in the work place (humor)
| January 1, 2017 | 1:50 pm | humor | No comments

Sunday January 01, 2017   

http://dilbert.com/

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: The one called Dilbert is showing signs of happiness at work. Boss: That means we can give him more work and he won’t quit. Excellent. Is anyone else exhibiting signs of unauthorized happiness? Catbert: No. Everyone else is in the narrow band of misery you want them to be in. If they were any happier, it would mean you’re overpaying them. If they were any less happy, the would take their own lives. If you don’t hear any laughing or screaming, it means you’re doing something right. Boss: What about moans? Catbert: Moans are ideal. That’s the sweet spot.

Read more: http://dilbert.com/#ixzz4UXbyze00

What’s all this sniffing about, Mr. Trump?
| September 27, 2016 | 9:36 pm | Donald Trump, humor, political struggle | No comments

By James Thompson

Social media has been all a twitter about a whole lot of sniffing going on last night during the presidential debate. Mr. Trump sniffed his way through the debate. No one really knows the cause of all that sniffing. So, that leaves us to endless speculation.

One commentator asked Mr. Trump this morning about the sniffing, and Mr. Trump replied that he does not have the sniffles and is “perfectly fine.” I guess that rules that out.

An ENT doctor opined that it was not due to a “deviated septum.” So much for that.

Mr. Trump insists that there was something wrong with his microphone.

What could possibly be the matter?

Could it be that there were tiny bugs in Mr. Trump’s nose and/or microphone? These can certainly be a source of irritation and can lead to sniffing.

Could it be that there were tiny feathers in Mr. Trump’s nose and/or microphone?

Could it be that Mr. Trump is developing an unusual form of Tourette’s disorder? If so, will he file for Social Security Disability Income?

Could it be that Mr. Trump was sniffing excessively to distract the public from the lack of content in his remarks?

Could it be that Mr. Trump has some dust residing on his nose hairs?

Could it be that Mr. Trump has a habit of putting some powdery substance in his nostrils to give himself extra energy?

Could it be that Mr. Trump was sniffing because he felt guilty about not paying taxes? Or that he felt sorry for the working people and their children that he has ripped off all these years?

Could it be that the US public will never know the reason for all this sniffing?

 

Pres. Nieto of Mexico flip-flops on Donald Trump’s wall proposal (humor)
| August 31, 2016 | 8:53 pm | humor | No comments

by James Thompson

Andy Borowitz of www.newyorker.com reported that Pres. Obama of the United States paid $5 billion to Mexico on the condition that they keep Donald Trump in Mexico and not allow him to return to the United States. Pres. Nieto reportedly stated that he would provide a path to citizenship for Mr. Trump if he becomes a productive citizen.

Breaking news has it that Pres. Nieto reversed himself and said that it is impossible for Mr. Trump to become a productive citizen anywhere in the world. Word has it that Pres. Nieto promptly returned the $5 billion and immediately made a counter proposal.

Pres. Nieto proposed to Pres. Obama that Mexico would foot the bill for a wall across the southern border of the United States and would make it twice as tall as Mr. Trump has suggested. In addition, Pres. Nieto would pay the United States $5 billion in cash if Pres. Obama can guarantee that neither Mr. Trump nor Mrs. Clinton will ever be allowed to come to Mexico again.

Word has it that Pres. Obama is considering Pres. Nieto’s proposal because the US government needs the cash, but is leaning against it because the cost to the United States would be too great. Apparently, Pres. Obama quipped “This would not be a bargain for the United States.”

Some are saying that Prime Minister Trudeau of Canada wants to get in on the action. It seems he has made a proposal to build a wall across the northern border of the United States and will pay the $5 billion to keep Mr. Trump and Mrs. Clinton out of Canada.

Both Pres. Nieto and Prime Minister Trudeau apparently received a dramatic boost in their popularity ratings in their respective countries. Reports are that both are enjoying a 90% approval rating among their respective constituents.

Pres. Obama is reportedly waiting to see what other nations will offer.